Never Lie to the Judge

Don and Frank met in the park every day to feed the pigeons, watch the squirrels and discuss world problems.

One day Frank didn’t show up. Don didn’t think much about it and figured maybe he had a cold or something. But after Frank hadn’t shown up for a week or so, Don really got worried. However, since the only time they ever got together was at the park, Don didn’t know where Frank lived, so he was unable to find out what had happened to him.

A month had passed, and Don figured he had seen the last of Frank, but one day, Don approached the park and — lo and behold — there sat Frank! Don was very excited and happy to see him and told him so. Then he said, “For crying out loud Frank, what in the world happened to you?”
Frank replied, “I have been in jail.”

“Jail!” cried Don. “What in the world for?”

“Well,” Frank said, “you know Jane, that cute little blonde waitress at the coffee shop where I sometimes go?”
“Yeah,” said Don, “I remember her. What about her?”
“Well, one day she filed rape charges against me; and, at 95 years old, I was so proud that when I got into court, I pleaded ‘guilty’.”

“The judge gave me 30 days for perjury.”

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