The kids filed into class Monday morning. They were all very excited. Their weekend assignment was to sell something, then give a talk on salesmanship. Little Sally led off.
“I sold Girl Scout cookies and I made $30” she said proudly. “My sales approach was to appeal to the customer’s civic spirit and I credit that approach for my obvious success.”
“Very good,” said the teacher.
Little Debbie was next. “I sold magazines,” she said. “I made $45 and I explained to everyone that magazines would keep them up on current events.”
“Very good, Debbie,” said the teacher.
Eventually it was Little Johnny’s turn. The teacher held her breath. Little Johnny walked to the front of the classroom and dumped a box full of cash on the teacher’s desk. “$2,467,” he said.
“$2,467!” cried the teacher, “What in the world were you selling?”
“Toothbrushes,” said Little Johnny.
“Toothbrushes,” echoed the teacher. “How could you possibly sell enough toothbrushes to make that much money?”
“I found the busiest corner in town,” said Little Johnny. “I set up a Dip & Chip stand and I gave everybody who walked by a free sample.” They all said the same thing, “Hey, this tastes like dog sh–.” I would say, “It is dog sh–. Wanna buy a toothbrush?”
I used the Nancy Pelosi method of giving you some crap, dressing it up so it looks good, telling you it’s free and then making you pay to get the bad taste out of your mouth.
Little Johnny got five stars for his assignment.