After being married for thirty years, a wife asked her husband to describe her. He looked at her for a while, then said, “You’re an alphabet wife … A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K.” She asks .. “What the hell does that mean?” He said,”Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, […]
A few old friends were enjoying a round of golf when one mentioned that he was going to go see Dr. Steinberg for a new set of dentures the next morning. His elderly buddy remarked that he, too, had gone to the very same dentist two years before. “Is that so?” asked the first old […]
Jack decided to go skiing with his buddy, Bob. So they loaded up Jack’s mini-van and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard. So they pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady who answered the door if they could spend the night. ‘I realize […]
One cold morning in early December we woke up to find our shoes sitting by the front door – each with a little baggie filled with candy. When we asked Mom – she told us the story of Saint Nicholas. Some countries celebrate St. Nicholas Day on December 5. Saint Nicholas Day is celebrated on […]
“Gentlemen, it is better to have died a small boy than to fumble the football”…..- John Heisman “I make my practices real hard because if a player is a quitter, I want him to quit in practice, not in a game.” Bear Bryant / Alabama “It isn’t necessary to see a good tackle, you can […]
Remember when Playboy magazine reportedly offered Sarah Palin $4,000,000 to pose nude in an upcoming issue? Then Michelle Obama was offered $5 by National Geographic? And when KFC offered a “Hillary” meal, consisting of two small breasts and two large thighs? Now KFC has a new offer, the “Nancy Pelosi Special,” It consists of nothing […]
A guy named Tom posted on his Facebook account the sports car that he had just purchased. A person approached him and told him that the money used to buy this car could have fed thousands of less fortunate people. Well, His response to this man made him famous on the internet. READ his story […]
“Sometimes, when I reflect on all the beer I drink, I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I did not drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. I […]
One day a farmer’s donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn’t worth it to retrieve the donkey. He invited all his […]
A guy is browsing in a pet shop, and sees a parrot sitting on a little perch. It doesn’t have any feet or legs. The guy says aloud, “Jeesh, I wonder what happened to this parrot.?” The parrot says, “I was born this way. I’m a defective parrot.” “Holy crap,” the guy replies. “You actually […]