Tag: #babyboomerhumor

The Lawyer and The Blonde

A lawyer boarded an airplane in New Orleans with a box of frozen crabs and asked a blonde flight attendant to take care of them for him. She took the box and promised to put it in the flight crew’s refrigerator. He advised her that he was holding her personally responsible for them staying frozen, […]

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Our Future Employees

My wife and I went through the McDonald’s drive-thru window and I gave the cashier a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her 25c. She said, ‘you gave me too much money.’ I said, ‘Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar back.’ She sighed and […]

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A Healthy Smoothie

A Frenchman, an Arab, and a Texas girl are in the same bar. When the Frenchman finishes his beer, he throws his glass in the air, pulls out his pistol, and shoots the glass to pieces… He says,’In France our glasses are so cheap we don’t need to drink with the same one twice.’ The […]

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Actions and Consequences

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Its Coming!

HEADS UP IT’S COMING!! This is what all of us 70 + to 80 + year olds have to look forward to!! This is something that happened at an assisted living center. The people who lived there had small apartments but they all ate at a central cafeteria. One morning one of the residents didn’t […]

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My New Truck

I bought a new Dodge 3500 Ram Tri-Flex Fuel Truck It’ll run on either hydrogen, gasoline, or E85. Had to go back to the dealer yesterday because I couldn’t get the radio to work. The service technician explained that the radio was voice-activated. ‘Nelson’, the technician said to the radio. The radio replied, ‘Ricky or […]

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Little Johnny

A teacher asked her class of 3rd graders how many of them were Kamala Harris fans. Not really knowing what a Kamala Harris fan is, but wanting to be liked by the teacher, all the kids raised their hands except for Little Johnny. The teacher asked Little Johnny why he has decided to be different…again. […]

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When a Man Loves a Woman

Bookseller conducting a market survey asks a woman, “Which book has helped you most in your life?” The woman replied, “My husband’s cheque book.” A prospective husband in a book shop asked, “Do you have a book called ‘Husband – Master of the House’?” The sales assistant replied, “Sir, fiction and comics are on the […]

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The Way to Heaven

An Angel visited a woman and told her she must give up smoking, drinking and unmarried sex if she wants to get into Heaven. The woman said she would try her best. The Angel visited the woman a week later to see how she was getting on. “Not bad” said the woman, “I’ve given up […]

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Saturday Morning Bliss

* Golf balls are like eggs – they’re white, they’re sold by the dozen, and a week later you have to buy more. * The pro-shop gets its name from the fact that you must have the income of a professional golfer to buy anything in there. * It’s amazing how a golfer who never […]

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