Tag: #babyboomerhumor

Man Rules

These are our rules! Please note.. these are all numbered “1 ” ON PURPOSE! 1. Men are NOT mind readers. ( FIRST & FOREMOST RULE) 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don’t hear us complaining […]

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An Alarming Statistic

The frequency of sexual activity of senior males depends on where they were born: Statistics just released from Stats Canada and The United Nations Board of Health Teams revealed that: North American men between 60 and 80 years of age, will on average, have sex two to three times per week. Whereas Japanese men, in […]

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Who’s the Boss?

Contentment is not the fulfillment of what you want, but the realization of how much you already have. Do you remember that old comedy TV show – “Tool Time” ? Once the tool man walked in the house, there was very little doubt who was really in charge.

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What Happens When They Raise the Minimum Wage

Guy goes into a bar, there’s a robot bartender. Since the minimum wage was increased to $15 the owner had to replace his regular human bartender. The robot says, “What will you have?” The guy says, “Martini.” The robot brings back the best martini ever and says to the man, “What’s your IQ?” The guy […]

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Doctor’s Advice for Better Life

Q: Doctor, I’ve heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true? A: Your heart only good for so many beats, and that it…don’t waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speeding up heart not make you live longer; it like saying you extend life of car by driving faster. Want to live longer? […]

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Are You Ready for Summer?

A young Arab boy asks his father, “What is that strange hat you’re wearing?” The father said: “Why, my son, it is a ‘chechia.’ In the desert it protects our heads from the intense heat of the sun.” “And what is the long flowing robe you are wearing?” asked the boy. “Oh, my son,” exclaimed […]

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Blessings of Aging

I very quietly confided to my best friend that I was having an affair. She turned to me and asked, “Are you having it catered?” And that, my friend, is the sad definition of “OLD”. #2 Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, “How old was […]

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Tax Audits in Canada

At the end of the tax year, CRA (Canada Revenue Agency) sent a tax inspector to audit the books of a local hospital. While the taxman was checking the books, he turned to the executive of the hospital and said: “I notice you buy a lot of bandages. I imagine there’s a lot of wastage […]

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Test your Memory

This test will keep that dreaded disease that effects your memory at bay! New Senior’s Exam, you only need 4 correct out of 10 questions to pass. 1) How long did the Hundred Years’ War last? 2) Which country makes Panama hats? 3) From which animal do we get cat gut? 4) In which month […]

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Don’t Mess with GrandMa

I told my wife I wanted to be cremated. She made me an appointment for Tuesday. Are you prepared for another power outage?

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