Tag: boomers humor

Basic Training

North Carolina Mountain Men – ain’t no dummies fer sure. Fifty-one years ago, Herman James, a North Carolina mountain man, was drafted by the Army. On his first day in basic training, the Army issued him a comb. That afternoon the Army barber sheared off all his hair. On his second day, the Army issued […]

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Every Man Wants

Mick and Paddy were fishing on the river Moy when Mick takes out a cigar, finding he had no matches, he asked Paddy for a light, Hold on a minuet says Paddy and then reaching into his tackle box, pulls out a Bic lighter 12 inches long. Good God man! exclaimed Mick, taking the huge […]

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Sending Your Child to Catholic School

Until a child tells you what  they are thinking, we can’t even  begin to imagine how  their mind is working…. Little Zachary was doing very  badly in math. His parents had tried  everything…tutors, mentors, flash cards, special  learning centers. In short, everything  they could think of to help his math.  Finally, in a last ditch […]

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Two Guys Go Into a Bar

Two Aussie builders (Keith & Ken) are seated either side of a table in a rough pub when a well-dressed man enters, orders a beer and sits on a stool at the  bar. The two builders start to speculate about the occupation of the suit. Ken: – I reckon he’s an accountant. Keith: – No way – he’s […]

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The Prayer

A visiting Pastor was attending a men’s breakfast in Farm County.  He asked one of the impressive older farmers in attendance to say grace that morning.  After all were seated, the older farmer began—— “Lord, I  don’t care for buttermilk. The Pastor opened one eye and wondered to himself where this was going. Then the […]

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Is a Nursing Home in your Future?

With the average cost for a  nursing home care costing $188.00 per day, there is a  better way when we get old and too feeble.  I’ve  already checked on reservations at the Holiday Inn.  For a  combined long term stay discount and senior discount,  it’s $59.23 per night. Breakfast is included, and some have  happy hours in the  […]

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Growing Up on the Farm

A Little boy comes down to breakfast. Since they live on a farm, his mother asks if he had done his chores. ” Not yet,” said the little boy. His mother tells him no breakfast until he does his chores. Well, he’s a little teed off, so he goes to feed the chickens, and he […]

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A Letter to Nancy

Dear Nancy, My husband hasn’t worked for the last 14 years. All he does is get dressed in the morning and hop in his fancy car to visit his cronies. I know he’s cheated on me many times with young girls who could be his granddaughters. I know this because he brags about this to […]

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From The Minds and Mouth’s of Sports’ Greatest

Don Meredith, Dallas Cowboys Quarterback once said: “Coach Tom Landry is such a perfectionist that if he was married to Raquel Welch, he would expect her to cook.” Harry Neale, professional hockey coach: “Last year we couldn’t win at home and we were losing on the road.  My failure as a coach was that I […]

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The Little Girl and The Congressman

A LITTLE GIRL ON A PLANE…… A congressman was seated next to a little girl on an airplane so he turned to her and said, “Do you want to talk?   Flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.”   The little girl, who had just started to read her book, […]

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